01 August 2011


You know what? Marathon training kind of sucks. I thought it would be more fun and that I would be more into it. Mostly it just makes me want to die. Just wanted to throw that out there.

As you may be able to tell from my super-positive intro, my AWESOME PLAN did not go awesomely. I am down on myself like whoa: I'm not running enough, when I do I'm running too slowly, blah blah blah, I have nothing good to report. (Melissa, I just know that after my marathon that woman who left you that comment is going to come over to my blog and point to this entry and be like "YOU DESERVED TO SUCK ON RACE DAY.") So instead I will regale you with tales of the Worst Run Ever, which took place Saturday morning.

Typically I like to do my long run on Sunday. I wanted to do between 12 and 13 miles this week, so my Saturday run was going to be around eight. I set out and was feeling okay and then thought, "Well, I'm already OUT here, maybe I should just tack on some extra miles and get my long run out of the way."

So! I did! This was a brilliant plan, except for the fact that it was 90 degrees and I hadn't brought any water and I did bring some Chomps but not really enough to keep me fueled since I HADN'T EATEN ANYTHING before I left and since I hadn't planned the route ahead of time I didn't really KNOW if I was going to hit 12 miles and I also didn't really KNOW if there would be any water fountains but whatever! Logical! Get it out of the way!

You can see where this is going. It was awful. I wanted to die. I was dehydrated and I felt like ass, probably because the sum total of the calories I had ingested that morning were three Gu Chomps and the half-and-half in my coffee, and also because it was eleventy billion degrees and I was dying of thirst. I finished the run after finding a water fountain and making out with it for about 10 minutes, but I walked a bit toward the end, and then just to add insult to injury, when I got home and mapped it out I discovered I had only run 11.3 miles. And let's not even DISCUSS how long it took me, though the super-slow time was at least partially due to the fact that a large chunk of the run was on trails and turned into a hike/run and whatever, it sucked, is my point.

I should also mention that my broken watch is still not fixed. The guy at the watch place is very confused whenever I call him; I dropped the thing off three weeks ago and am not sure that they have even made steps to order the watchband needed to fix it. In the interim I am using my dad's watch, which is from 1989 and has a plastic band. He also found an iPod shuffle in his office and gave it to me for my long runs. It's the original one, with the USB drive built in. If you average together my current running gear I am essentially running in 1995.



At least someone understands me.

After my run Saturday I returned my evil new running shoes. They were making my quads hurt all the time. I think secretly they were setting them on fire somehow, perhaps when I was sleeping. I left Movin Shoes with a new pair, plus a handheld water bottle and watermelon-flavored Chomps, because my bff salesman Tom said I had to try them. (He also told me that he ran 10 miles that morning and it also sucked, so it wasn't just me.) WE'LL SEE HOW IT GOES. Then last night I registered for another half-marathon.

It's on Aug. 13 and it's an evening race, which is happy because I like running in the evening; also partially scary because it's semi-rural Wisconsin and thus will be fairly dark and so there is extra-high potential that I will a) get lost and/or b) fall down and die. I am not so worried about the falling down and dying as I have my RoadID so at least the authorities will know who I am and will be able to notify my dad, though he will be on vacation then so it may be days before they come to identify the body. If there's no race recap by Aug. 15, just assume I'm in a better place.

TO SUMMARIZE: training sucks right now, and my mental state sucks worse, but I'm determined to crack this thing. So there!


  1. You better hope she doesn't find your blog! :)

    I have decided that race directors need to get their act together & schedule races so you DONT HAVE TO TRAIN IN THE SUMMER. Good God, what are we doing to ourselves?!

  2. What? You're not in a better place already? We were beginning to wonder. ;-) Be sure to take a flashlight, or three, on that moonlight run. I went on a long run last night that took (3) hours, and it was cold, windy and dark by the time I was done. At least you survived your run. B-)

    I can recommend Clif Shot Bloks (Lemon-Lime). They are very good.

  3. Best of luck with that training. After last year's RNR Chicago 1/2 I seriously doubt I will be training in the summer ever again. These temps are evil! I hope you find a way to overcome the nasty temps!

    And '95 was "dope." I was a 5th grader and life was easy :)